you have some good point. however, 爱本身 DOES NOT 意味着心理界限的模糊, 爱mean that we can choose to relax our 心理界限. with it, then both party will have freedom to not disappointed.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-4(#8744761@0)
When kids are driving, if they are under 18, my boundary is that they are not allowed to drive. If they are over 18, then my boundary is to training him to no drinking and driving, and training him to not make phone call and driving.I will 担心, but after make sure he get trained properly, know all the rules, have done my part best. then i will let him drive.
otherwise, what is your viewpoint? are you not allowing him/her to drive?
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-4{203}(#8744812@0)
控制欲的问题 is 心理界限的问题. Only the person who don't know about 心理界限, they will either have 控制欲, or not 担心 their kids at all.by the way, i will 担心my kids. however, we have to let them develop their ability.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-5{84}(#8746421@0)
I like your post. Thanks for sharing.
-wdmcz(I like summer);
2014-5-5(#8746829@0)
thanks.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-5(#8746990@0)
不要为明天担忧 doesn't mean that we don't need to prepare for tomorrow. we should pray, prepare for tomorrow. of course, this is just my viewpoint.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-4(#8744822@0)
No, No, No，想得少一点，不等于不负责任。这是两个概念。一个老农很负责任的种地，但他的思维就是很简单的！至于Happy是否跟正确处理问题有关，如何衡量处理问题是否正确呢？比如说，到底是忍耐正确还是计较正确？大多数情况下没有正确答案，也就取决于心态了！
-wenhao2008(问号);
2014-5-5(#8746811@0)
Give your example, when一个老农很负责任的种地, he have to think more: he have to know if it is going to raining, he have to select the best seed to plane for next year, he have to fertilize land to produce more. 想得少一点，等于takes less 责任.The one who think nothing and plan nothing will produce nothing.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-5{64}(#8746814@0)
It is not about 到底是忍耐正确还是计较正确. It is about how to 处理问题 properly so that all involved parties can be happy and gain win-win situation.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-5(#8746817@0)
很多人越界可能还意识不到，老人对子女，对子女配偶的要求越界，孩子对父母的索取越界， 朋友之间，配偶之间要求越界...最后变成如何解决冲突，如何取舍问题. 所以教孩子学会选择很重要.let the choices you made today be the choices that you can live with tomorrow.
-legotoys(lego);
2014-5-3(#8742462@0)
It is not a easy task. I found that writing is a good way to overcome weakness. you may try it as well.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-4(#8744753@0)
如果开始时，有人指点一下，一定获益非浅. - I totally agree with you on it. those people are the one who i call it 貴人. the more we help others and to be their 貴人, the more we can get help from 貴人.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-4(#8744832@0)
你会希望孩子的成绩一直保持中等而不突出嘛. -the answer is yes, i will not put all my focus on her IQ, to be the number one or top 5 in IQ in class. instead, I will train her more on EQ, and MQ.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-5(#8746364@0)
To be more precise, I will develop her IQ, EQ and MQ in the equal weight. I will not only focus on her IQ. does it answer your question?
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-5(#8746438@0)
很同意你说的develop IQ, EQ&MQ in the equal weight （但不知道MQ是啥，惭愧下）。我问的是成绩不是IQ，我一直的理解是学霸们IQ肯定高，但willing to excel, discipline, persistence & industrious也不可缺。学习成绩全由IQ定？IQ指天生的智商，还是经过训练的综合素质？
-xiaoyu2012(笑语);
2014-5-5(#8746657@0)
My understanding of 'willing to excel, discipline, persistence & industrious' is all about EQ. IQ is about studying score. MQ is about how to manage finance properly, i.e. able to manage money but not managed by money.
-spruce(加国的枫叶红了);
2014-5-5(#8746825@0)