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Looking for a soul mate, a man who is single or a single father between 44 and 52.

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛I hope I have a warm house with a nice man. I like cleaning room, cooking and eating. Before long, in the future, the kids and friends will visit our small, warm house on holiday or we can visit them. I like serve relatives and friends at my home and like to visit friends’ home, have a cup of wine, chart and play with same age of people.

I am a health, divorced, have a good body shape (in my age) woman and live a stable, simple life with my 12-year old daughter. Every month I spend 2 500 ( 2 000 for basic survive cost, like necessary rent, food, clothes, shoes, communication and traffic, 500 for extravagance, like my daughter taking some programs, or for fun, or for travel). The reason that I post my life expend here is if we fit each other, if you live a simple life like us, I would like to invite you joining us. I am pretty sure, when we share with each others, we can save money from rent, communication, and traffic costs for have more money to go annual travel and have more fun. I feel that it’s comfortable to live with a man who has as similar economic situation as us. I don’t need depending on others.

I am a good partner of entertainment, especially, sports. In summer, I am a good companion of outside running, walking and tennis while in winter I am a good partner of swimming, table tennis and badminton. I like classic music and Kara ok.

Longer the good relationship, more common we will have. Longer living together, more same interesting, more same topics, and more similar opinions we will have. Most of all, more benefit we will receive from each other. Trust me.

I am 46 years old, 1.67cm , 60kg, and average looking woman, I want my man at least 3cm taller than me and he has a moderate weight. If you understand me and like to contact me, please PM plus your opinions and a brief description of yourself. Or e-mail: yunhealthcare@yahoo.com.cn. Thank you so much.

Thank you.

If you are a man who is looking for some experiences, I am not the woman you are looking for. It seems that a lot of middle age men, they still try find some women who are too young to them, they still engage to play game, and they are still immature. If you do not mind that you have big possibility to have to look for a long-term partner or wife in your 60s or 70s, you do not need to consider my advice. Let me list some disadvantages of big age difference between a couple.

Disparity in Sex Drives
“The biggest danger” is that in marriages where there is a big age difference, at some point, there is likely to be a disparity in the sex drives of the two people involved. This disparity could be a contributing factor to infidelity.
Unable to Relate Due to Generation Gap (it was said that 7 years is a generation)
Lifestyle differences, differences in moral values, even differences in seemingly minor things such as tastes in music, reading, or entertainment may eventually cause the couple to be unable to relate to each other because of a “generation gap.” If one party begins to seek out members of his or her peer group because they have more things in common with each other, it can lead to problems -- especially if that person is a member of the opposite sex.
A Higher Risk of Infidelity
The greater the age difference, the greater the risk of infidelity.


This the article I posted at 51. ca. Please read and feel free to give me some comment. Thank you so much.

46岁以后快乐的人生---生活在多伦多

愿同龄的人们日子过的恩恩爱爱,红红火火,有生有色。

对于我们来说,今天永远是我们这一生最年轻,最美好的一天。

忘记了是谁说过的一句话,如果你经常念叨过去的事,说明你开始衰老了;如果你在为将来作打算,说明你还年轻。
46岁,正是好好为将来打算的年龄,不但要为将来做好经济上的准备,还要做好物质(生理)和精神(心理)上的准备。

如果身边还没有伴,那就抓紧时间找一个。爱人(伴侣)不可能完美,但应是最亲密的朋友。生活在一起,不要求事事和谐,只要两人的爱好有三分之一相似,相同,三分之一可以迁就,培养,剩下三分之一就可以互不干涉,这就很好了。身边有一个伴互相关照,互相体贴,精神上经常沟通,排解,这种生活方式可以最大限度的增强对心理和生理疾病的免疫能力。
有几个谈得来,玩得来的朋友,可以一起喝点葡萄酒,聚餐,打牌,聊天,卡拉OK,一起运动,一起出去旅游,一起疯,一起乐,但切记,人到中年凡事不要过度,过度产生副作用。亲密的朋友和亲情同等重要,和朋友交谈能减轻各种压力,特别是和一些对生活始终充满希望,不断地充实自己,不断地完善自己的人们交谈。
每周3-4小时有氧运动,如冬天室内长距离游泳,室内羽毛球和跑步机,春秋夏天不太强烈阳光下的慢跑,快走和网球。每周1-3次的床上运动(次数和程度因人而异),如果不喜欢,可以寻找其他乐趣。
学会自己理财,做一些金融投资。虽然快乐并不需要太多的金钱,但舒适的生活需要有足够的金钱,多少算足够呢,这也是因人而异。

关于有氧运动,越早,越快行动越好。无论我们的基础如何,早一年开始有规律的运动,我们就可以早一年过更健康的生活。如果你还只是偶尔运动运动,那就赶快制定一个具体的运动计划,订下具体的运动时间和具体的运动项目。健康投资越早投资时间越长,收益越多。我从三十多岁开始长距离游泳,不过真正坚持平均每周2次下水还是来到多伦多之后。在这里游泳池很多,不需要花太多的钱,也不需要同伴,只需要坚持。游泳除了增强心脏血液循环系统的功能,还能运动很多肌肉群,游泳给了我一个均匀的身材。但是游泳不能保持身体的灵敏度,也不能增强骨骼的密度,这些方面我们可以用其他运动方式补充:冬天室内羽毛球,乒乓球,春夏秋室外阳光下(避开强烈阳光)的网球,跑步和快走。对于女性,需要更多的阳光下的运动,因为我们的骨密度减少比男性减少的多,在这方面男性具有不小的优势。
生活在多伦多,这些最基本的运动方式都不需要花太多的钱就可以唾手可得。

关于性,我认为,一对伴侣,如果男女双方都是性冷淡,一切都好办,可以在其他方面培养共同的乐趣,无性的伴侣同样有快乐的生活。但是,如果喜欢性生活的和不喜欢性生活的生活在一起,那么,不是以一方永远忍耐为代价,就是发生令人不能忍受的三角关系,或是以分手为结局,这三种方式都不是理想的结局,前二种长期发展都不利于生理心理的健康。
我认为人生的伴侣双方对性生活的态度应该一致,不能各行其是,这是原则。

如果没有事故和致命的疾病,我们每一个健康的人都可能活到90岁。所以从46岁开始,人生的道路还有一半漫长的旅程,还有数不尽的美好和快乐等待我们自己去营造。二,三十岁的时候我们很难设计我们未来的生活,因为未来还有太多的不定的因素,还有太多的我们不能控制的因素。46岁,我们可以选择适合我们的生活方式,可以好好计划后半生的生活。我们的未来控制在我们自己的手中。

虽然我们想尽办法能够稍稍延缓衰退的步伐,但终究不能不面对机能一天比一天衰老的现实。生理的衰退无法抗拒,但心理可以调节:坦然地接受衰老,适应衰老。
生活中有太多的事要我们操心,很多事不能回避,生理毛病一年比一年多,我们也逃避不了。我们能做的到的是:在生活中挖掘,制造快乐!让快乐的时间多一点,让快乐比烦恼多一点。我知道,这一点说起来容易做起来很不容易,但我们必须努力去做,从日常生活中的小事上发现快乐,开心和容易满足不只是属于孩子们。“快乐比烦恼多一点”,生活对我们的吸引,生活对我们的奖赏就在于此。如果生活中快乐始终多于烦恼,那么生活就永远对我们有吸引力,无论我们多老。

我对中老年的生理和心理健康很感兴趣, 特别是生理和心理康复。
46岁以后的生活可以分成3个时期;46-退休,退休后-80,80后的生活。其中80岁后的生活是我最不可想象,最想研究的生活。
这是我最近考虑了很久得出的结论:努力去发展一种职业外的工作,比如做护士工作的人去做些个人金融投资,这种第二职业不会让我们退休,我们可以一直工作到大脑失去正常功能为止。这种职业能力不需要他人的承认和肯定,不论大小每一次投资成功都是对我们的奖赏,也许这种奖赏可以一直让我们感到生活得很充实很有价值。
老年后期(80岁以后),最常见的心理问题是老年忧郁症,这种疾病是由于生理功能的衰弱而产生心理上问题:感到自己的生活已经没有价值,没有希望了。怎么样才能始终保持健康的心理,关于这个问题,我想以后专门写一篇文章有关老年后的生活,还需要我做很多interview和research。

我很羡慕一些70-80岁的名人倒在自己的工作岗位上。

想想看,我们怎样才能有一个有意义,舒适的后半生?

写在我46岁生日之际,愿和同龄人探讨。更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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